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Oh Karma, Karma.

He was there constantly,
with affection, care and concern.

She was there constantly,
with neglect, selfishness and intoxication.

Now shes there constantly,
with affection, care and concern.

Now hes there constantly,
with neglect, selfishness and intoxication.

Oh, karma, karma.

She deserves it.

XoXo

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KITTTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN !!!!

MUTHAEFFING ADORABLENESS !!!!!

(PS- Yes, shes all squashed up. Muahahahaha. Im evviiiiiiiiiiiiil)

Hyper, hyper !
Sober, sober !
Hyper, hyper !
Happy, happy !

Gweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ! ^^

Labels: acid crue, adorable kittens, kittens, Kitty-x, Kittyn, Kittyn-x, kittyn-x.blogspot.com, Kittynx

XoXo

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Chasing Ghosts

I think one of my biggest flaws is not knowing how to/when to let go.
Lately, i constantly find myself looking back and remembering all the good times of the past.
But instead of reminiscing and being content with what i had, im wishing and longing for all of it to come back.

Let go.

Stop chasing ghosts..

XoXo

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FuckFuckFuckFuck

Im safe, up high.
Nothing can touch me.
But why do I feel this party's over...

No pain inside.
You're my protection.
So how do i feel this good sober...

Escape, escape, escape.
I wanna fucking run, hide, live in denial.

And it whispers to me,
"Softly come and play"

And I, I'm falling...
And if i let myself go Im the only one to blame.

Weak, weak, weak.
How'd I let myself succumb to this.

Coming down, coming down.
Spinning round, spinning round, spinning round.
Looking for myself, sober...

When its good then it's good,
It's all good till it goes bad.
Till you try to find the you that you once had.

Repeat, repreat, repat.
Over and over, again and again.

I have heard myself crying never again.
Broken down in agony, just trying to find a friend...

Give up, give up, give up.
Too many times its happened and i just wanna let go.

Im safe, up high.
Nothing can touch me.
But do I feel this party's over...

No pain inside.
You're like perfection.
So how do i feel this good sober...

XoXo

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Down, Down, Down, Down

Sometimes i wonder if everyone else's life is the same as mine.
The constant highs and lows ; problem after problem.
Cause i honestly dont see other peoples' lifes being filled with such constant drastic changes.
Or maybe its just the whole the grass is always greener on the otherside thing.

It seems like everytime things go smoothly, i get hit in the fucking face with a really huge boulder and fall right back down.

Lifes spiraling downwards. Again.

Constant lows ; problem after problem..

It seems like everything ive been working so hard for is all going down the drain. And this time, after all the other fights, im exhausted.

I know im supposed to be strong. Im supposed to try and not let the things around me drag me down. But how is it even the least humanly possible to fucking do that.

Works been stressing the shit out of me. And everything else isnt helping.

And unfortunately i seem to have slum back into my old habits of intoxicating myself and not thinking to just be free for that howver short while before i close my eyes and drift off to sleep and wake up to the same damn thing over and over again.

And everything is slowly but steadying sucking and draining whatever little life i have left inside outta me.

My bodys deteriorating. Brains malfunctioning. Screaming at me, hurling abuse, telling me to fucking do something before theres another meltdown.

But im tired. Fucking tired.
So effing ready to wave the white flag that im secretly hoping and wishing that the amazing people around me who DO NOT deserve all this shit from me would get fed up and give up so that i can give up on myself.

Cause in all sincerety, i am fucking ready to do that.

No more fights. No more putting up a brave front. No more struggles. No more anything.

I definately believe that theres only so much a person can help someone else. And theres always a point where he/she would give up.

Im ready to give up. Lets all slowly wait and see the people around me give up too ? =)

XoXo

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Laugh Your Asses Off.

This is what happens at work when i leave my comp unattended with my Friendster logged in.
PS - Click on the pics to enlarge and read what it says on my profile.

L.O. MUTHAEFFING. L.

I hate them. Lol. Cant believe they fucking messed with my Fster and gave away my number. Grr.
And needless to say, Winston was the one behind it.
And he did it when he got me to get his breakfast/lunch for him. Fuck i even got a call to go get ham from Cold Storage, which they did not actually want, just to have more time to edit my Fster.
And i didnt even find out bout it till i started receiving calls and messsages from random people.
Lol. Grr.
But it is things like this that make me love work... fun fun. Even though its at my expense most of the time. Psht.

PPS - To the people who actually managed to get my number... call/text all you want. I wont be replying senseless shit =)

Labels: acid crue, friendster, Kitty-x, Kittyn, Kittyn-x, kittyn-x.blogspot.com

XoXo

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Such Bad Things.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!
The HORROR ! The horrroooooooorrrrr ~~
My ex and my bestfriend !?!?! WTFZZZZZ !?!?
-cries-

JOKE XD

Haha. It was me using Wayne's account on Facebook (Dont have facebook, need to get one soon !) to play poker. Hehehe.
Random. But yeh. Hehe.

XoXo

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To Change, Or Not To Change ?

Then

...

Now

No more drawn on eyebrows, outrageous clothes, dreads, makeup, big hair...
Whatd ya'll think ?

Upgrade / Downgrade ?
(cause im unsure, pffft)

Labels: acid crue, Dreads, forever 21, goth girl, gothic, pink dreads, Synthetic dreads

XoXo

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Swing, Swing.

Works been driving me mad.
Forcing out major mood swings.
One minute im laughing my ass off.
The next im depressed as fuck.

...
or maybe its just me ?

XoXo

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The Lil' Things

The reason i occasionally log into MSN for awhile at work ?

Receiving random offline messages from teh bestfriend containing links to random videos from youtube that cheer me up =)

Suppaaaa Kawaiii ! ^^

XoXo

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You Areeee Bliiiiiiiiiiind !!!!!

This happened at work today :

Lady at Counter with kid: -is all flabergasted- Omg. Do your ears hurt?!?!?
Me: Haha. Naw...
Lady at counter with kid: How long did it take to do that?
Me: -blabbers on explaining the process-
Lady at Counter with kid: -ignores me and talks to kid- Boy ah, look at AUNTIE'S ear. So big !

WTFZ !?!?!?!?
I LOOK LIKE AN AUNTIE !?!!?
-dies-

PS - I officially have no social life thanks to work. -sigh-

Labels: 38mm lobes, acid crue, Kittyn, large gauge earlobes

XoXo

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100th Post !

w00ots.
I know. Im lame. Haha.
Anywho...

Im amazed. Its 12.40am and im actually home and relaxed having satisfy my craving for pasta cabonara (courtesy of teh maid) and scrubbing myself down x)

Usually at this hour i would have just gotten home and by the time im done with the stuff i hafta do, itd be round 1++am so i hardly ever get time to just sit down relax and/or be on the comp.
So yes. Today was good -nods-
Works been hectic and not really going great but uh wells..

So... how bout some randomn bits of the week so far !

Took a quiz the other night. Stolen from Audrey's blog x) Hehe.

What is your True Fear? Your Result: Losing Someone You love affection and the people in your life more than anything. Your greatest fear is that one day someone you care about won't be there anymore. You are a very friendly and inviting person, who draws in a lot of friendships with your kind, considerate, and loyal nature. However, deep down you are slightly insecure and unsure of yourself. You couldn't deal with it if you didn't have one of your loved ones in your life anymore. You don't have too much to worry about though, because with a friend like you, no one will want to lose you either!
Being Alone
Disappointment
Looked down on
Commitment
Death
Where Your life is Going
What is your True Fear? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Cant say that im surprised with the result at all. Haha.. I get attached to people very easily and am constantly paranoid bout losing them.
And of course with that comes the fear of being alone. Baaah.

Oh. And over the weekends i got really sick.
Damn flu again. + fever =( Total waste of a weekend if you ask me. Psht.
And... im back on my meds again. For anxiety... my doctor seems to think that i need help controling my emotions. (EFF YOU BIIITCH!!!!!!!!)
But i aunnoo.. i dont really like the idea of being able to function normally only with chemicals reacting inside of me.
Boy, arent i a wreck.

Ahem! Right. Moving onnn...

L4D with Nina and Wayne the other night.
Played versus mode and it is fucking amazing ! Ugh. I am so hooked on the game and its burning a hole in my already torn pocket =P

Speaking of L4D ; for all you fans out there, check out this video.
Funny chicken ass shit yo ! x)

Labels: acid crue, Kitty-x, Kittyn, Kittyn-x, kittyn-x.blogspot.com, L4d, left 4 dead, www.kittyn-x.blogspot.com

XoXo

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